The Ebb and Flow of Letting Go

A powerful mama and advocate for improving child welfare, Philly writes, “I learned to love. I learned, unnaturally or not, what it means to be a mother. That is something the abusers of my childhood never took from me. “

Finicky Philly

My nerves and heart were both tested this week. The realization that the world can intrude on the safe, secure space I have built for my mini me, came crashing. Former foster children who become loving parents are rocked hard deep in the soul even by minor intrusions on the children we have sometimes smothered for their own protection! 🙂

Me and my girl. Me and my girl prepare for Santa’s visit!

Often our minds are flooded with the physical and emotional trials of our own past; innocence and trust ripped from us before we knew what either meant. The moments that flash like slide show images when insecurity, fear, doubt, and frustrations sit at our door as adults. It is startling. This is why many former foster children try not to love or attach to anything. For those like me, who ventured into loving motherhood, the slope is especially tricky. We are vulnerable…

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Don’t judge so quickly, coach

Baseball films are my fave. Mark asks, “Are you ready for a film about a cross-country team?”

Mark Bialczak

(From syracusenewtimes.com) (From syracusenewtimes.com)

When the coach played by Kevin Costner in “McFarland, USA” takes one look at the the situation he’s gotten he and his family into, he’s an unhappy fellow.

But then Jim White learns he shouldn’t just assume stuff, a pretty good lesson for a man who’s a teacher.

And by the time the Disney movie about a group of real-life cross-country runners from a tiny town in California is over, this critic is quite certain it’s best to not to assume that every sports film to come down the pike is going to completely fit a certain stereotype.

You can read my weekly Film Review blog today on the Syracuse New Times site by clicking the link below.

http://www.syracusenewtimes.com/run-fast-see-mcfarland-usa/

Are you ready for a film about a cross-country team? Do you have a certain predisposition about sports films? What’s your favorite Kevin Costner sports film, and why?

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Back again

“This quote is for those, like myself, who get uncomfortable with too much positivity in the face of crap. I don’t want to wallow in self-pity, but I do want to say, “Yeah, this sucks” and not dance around the matter singing, “The sun’ll come out tomorrow.”

D.K. Pope

There is a quote in a little book illustrated by Maurice Sendak that, years ago, became one of those things I bonded with, and so my brain carries it around and brings it up more often than not.

Here we are back again, lots of work and lots of pain.

First, I’d like to know exactly what 13-year-old Devin was dealing with that was so painful. Math? Making her bed? Truly horrendous.

Anyway, as I sit here, already 19 days into the new year, that quote rings in my head. The next few months are laid out before me like a long, arduous hike. And, really, I’m not dealing with the worst of it. My husband, M, has a ridiculous semester of studying, teaching and working. Throw a bomb in called preliminary exams and I’ll be happy to get him back in one piece by the end.

So, my work…

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