“I see myself increasingly pulling back, almost unconsciously putting up protective barriers, ones that conserve my energy for the things I have to do, the things which must come first, all the mundane details of functioning in a life.”
The longer you live, the more events you will live through. Now, we are aware of all of them. Nothing escapes notice or media attention, especially if it is bad. On the one hand, that’s beneficial; people can’t do anything about problems that have never reached their radar. On the other, it’s a burden; we hear of so much we can never do anything about, and yet, as emotional beings, we both want to, and are expected to respond in some way.
I think about this a lot. And I see in myself, a growing protective instinct. I have always been one to worry and fret and feel moved by other people’s pain, especially when it’s visited upon them by no fault of their own. I am not sure, however, that those emotions do anyone any good. In mid-life, too, I see that there’s no end to it. From here…
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